Saturday, May 21, 2011

Dearly Departed

I just wrote about missing my mom on Mother’s Day. Perhaps it would have been more noticeable in the US. I mention it because today would have been her 85th birthday if she were still here. Earlier this month marked the second anniversary of my sister’s death. I had such a busy time in that first week of May that it was the end of the day before it occurred to me.

My dad was another great influence on my life. But in many ways I am far more used to him being gone. Last November marked 10 years of his passing. I spent several teen years being at odds with him – especially over his alcohol abuse/addiction but I was able to forgive him while he was still alive – realizing that he was doing all he knew, coping the only way he’d been taught. And that I had no control over his choices or that God chose to put me in his family. He left this world for the next when we were on very good terms. There is a very certain peace in that, even when I am not sure I will ever see him again.

I miss each of my dearly departed family members – but each in different ways. Thinking about them causes me to realize my own mortality and how everything seems to be so fleeting in this life. What legacy did they leave behind? What will I leave behind?

No concrete answers today. Just the honoring of my family members that influenced me over the years. These are the things I think about when I’m shifting from one side of the globe to the other.

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